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Wednesday, April 23, 2014

A Modest Proposal that Does Not Involve Eating Babies

UPDATE: You can just read it here.

                                                                                            Source: Wikimedia Commons

Hey folks. Those who know me personally know that I do dumb stuff. Like all the time. So here's the newest dumb thing I'm thinking about doing:
What if I made a website and published my novel on it? Like a real website and not some blogger thing. It would be a 2-3 times a week update kind of thing and I'd rewrite my first draft and post it as I do.

DID YOU GUYS KNOW THAT I HAVE WRITTEN A NOVEL???!?!?!?!?!

"OK," you say. "What if? Who cares? What do I have to do with this? Is this some kind of thought experiment? Why are you looking at me like we're on a desert island and picturing me as a t-bone steak or a chicken leg?

Well here's what I say in reply: what if you paid a couple of bucks?

I've lost some of you already. For those still here, here's what I figure: it would cost about $60 to host a site on which I would post this thing. Are there 30 of you who would pay $2? 20 who would pay $3? These are the kinds of questions I think about when I'm trying to go to sleep.

What if, and bear with me on this one, what if I did a Kickstarter to raise $60?

This is what such a thing would look like: I would rewrite and post the first two chapters and post it on Kickstarter with an impassioned plea similar to this one. If you like what you read, you can pitch in. If you don't: listen, we're still friends. And here's the really interesting part: if you like what you've read so far, would you share it with people who are strangers to me? Like, your cool (wealthy) Facebook and Twitter and real-life friends? Is that a thing that would happen?

Would you on your own blog tell people, "Hey dudes I've got a friend trying to do this thing?"

There are some caveats here:
Please don't agree to this out of charity.
This is a genuine request to gauge interest. If you have no intention of reading what I write but hope that I'll shut up about it on Facebook, just ask me politely to shut up about it on Facebook.

If we want to do this as a fun Kickstarter with rewards the goal would be a little more than $60
That way if I mail you something or give you a lil' present the money or I come have lunch with you it doesn't come out of hosting fees and negate the whole thing

If by some miracle a bunch of people read and like the book, I may have ads on the site.
This is something I'll have to think about. But I want to be up front with everyone right away that this is a possibility.

Here's all you have to do right now. Leave a comment on this post saying "yeah, man, let's do this." OR comment on the Facebook post saying, "Listen. I'll give your two chapters a shot. No promises, but I like your smile so I've got a couple of seconds to waste on your B.S." You don't have to commit to anything, just let me know if you're interested. Also you could private message me or text me or call me or stop me in the street and make a similar statement by using one of those methods or even something more creative like skywriting or something. Though, let's be honest, if you're going to spend that much on skywriting I'd rather you just contribute that to the Kickstarter.